A Sunless Garden
by SirArthurNudge
Summary: Tenzin reminiscences on his past.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

To his later and almost eternal shame, he didn't notice her.

He knew of her, her name and station but during those first and - to Pema - all important months that she spent learning her place and duties among the acolytes on the island, Tenzin never really registered her existence.

In later years when the thought struck him, he would often attempt to justify it to himself. The reasons he contrived were always the same - about how he was a very different man at the time and so busy too with mediation, his father's careful tutelage and, of course, Lin.

The end result was the same no matter what the cause.

Pema passed him by like a ghost, a hint of color just beyond his sight.

It didn't stop him cringing with regret when she would talk wistfully of those months, of his brief acknowledgements that meant so much to her but he barely remembered.

He would never tell her that.

Instead he became very good at turning her thoughts to the very first time he noticed her properly.

* * *

><p>It all finally overwhelmed him on her fifth month among the community on the island.<p>

The burden of his birth and gifts had almost broken him. The weight of his father's expectations had proved almost too much to bear.

Not that Aang had ever pushed him to be anyone but himself but Tenzin knew the magnitude of the task before him.

He really was the last airbender.

That fact was made painfully clear to him by his father's health starting its slow decline.

He had sat to breakfast one fateful morning with his parents and watched his once robust father cough and sputter to catch his breath.

His mother had looked to Tenzin and he saw glimmers of fear and despair in her normally cheery blue eyes.

Tenzin left shortly afterwards to find comfort and seek advice from his partner of so many years but Lin was... well, Lin.

She had nerves of steel and sometimes a heart of stone to match. He had tried to confide in her his fears but she was snowed under herself with work and her own attempts to impress and win approval from her mother.

She was short with him when he arrived, barely listened to his concerns before he took the hint and left her to her work.

Tenzin did not take her actions to heart. After so many years together they knew each other through and through. Lin had almost as much weight on her shoulders as he did.

He went home.

* * *

><p>The island's gardens were a sight to be seen with the flowers in full bloom and life just flowing out from every corner.<p>

With so many visitors and acolytes, Tenzin struggled to think of somewhere he could rest alone in.

He brightened a little when one such secluded spot popped into his mind. A place that no one ever went to.

It was a small corner garden facing out of the bay. It was rarely tended to and he arrived there fully expecting it to be covered in brambles and briars of all types.

To his surprise, it was perfect.

The low bushes were trimmed and manicured. Its flower beds devoid of anything other than the colorful blooms whose scent lingered heavily in the air.

What surprised Tenzin the most was the slight young woman struggling to cut a straggling overhead branch from a tree.

"What are you doing?"

Pema dropped the rusty saw she was using in fright. It clattered off her foot, causing her to hop comically on the other while desperately soothing her sore toes.

"Ouch!" she hissed before she lost her footing altogether and fell heavily on her rear.

She let out pained moan before rolling on to her side on the grass.

Tenzin had been too taken aback by the series of events to help but now rushed forward.

"Are you alright? I will get you back to the infirmary or the dormitories!"

"I'm fine," came her answering groan. "Just need a minute to catch my breath."

* * *

><p>When she could finally sit upright once more, Pema flushed bright red in her embarrassment.<p>

"Sorry you had to see that, Master Tenzin."

He was perplexed. "See what?"

"My clumsiness. I'm working on being more graceful with Jun." She looked up at him slightly fearfully. "You... you won't tell her about this, right?"

Tenzin was swallowed up by the deep green eyes that he gazed into.

"I won't. Did you do all of this?" he answered after swallowing to wet his suddenly dry throat.

"My mother used to garden a lot and she taught me. I found this place on my first week here. It was really overgrown but-"

Pema got to her feet rapidly with only the slightest of grimaces as she straightened upright.

"I never thought to ask if it was okay to work here! I just thought - I have no idea what I thought!" she gushed out. Pema bowed low to Tenzin. "Forgive me, Master Tenzin, if I have done wrong!"

He put a firm hand on her upper right arm and dragged her out of the bow. "There is nothing to apologize for. I haven't seen this place look this good in a long while."

Tenzin picked up the saw from where it landed. "I don't know much about gardening. Not quite in my training."

He smiled at Pema. "But you seem to know what to do and I am at a loose end. Helping you here will be a good distraction."

Tenzin gestured at the low branch she had been attempting to cut down. "That first?"

Pema nodded and beamed at him.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

It became habit more than anything else at the start.

His weekly routine was mostly unchanged except for the few hours he spent with Pema tending that small forgotten garden.

He would never had admitted it at the time but those quiet moments together relaxed him more than the hours he spent with his father meditating.

Together they watched the flowers blossom, wilt and then fade. Sweet fruits took their place and fed more creatures than Tenzin had ever thought to live on the island with them.

He helped Pema collect the seeds and plant them deep in the soil in preparation for another season.

It felt good to work the soil and see the fruits of their labors in a more tangible way than the spiritual endeavors his father encouraged him in.

Over those blissful hours, Pema and Tenzin talked.

At first it was awkward and stunted chatter with Pema trying her hardest not to let her tongue run away with the conversation.

Before long it became wonderfully comfortable and easy-going – like old friends meeting after some time apart.

Tenzin had balked at how young she was when Pema finally told him her age– a mere eighteen to his thirty-four years.

Yet, she had wisdom in her that belied that youth.

Tenzin, with no awareness of what was slowly happening, soon come to rely more on her opinion and advice than he did Lin's - something his girlfriend noticed with the distinct lack of communication with Tenzin and the fact their separations from each other were going on longer than they ever had.

Lin knew something was wrong but had yet to figure it out.

For Tenzin and Pema, their gardening adventures slowly expanded outwards to include lazy hours spent meditating - sometimes discussing the old tomes of knowledge that Pema was learning just as he had so long ago.

She became his most constant companion for tea - so much in fact that Tenzin actively seeked her out before even considering a cup.

Tenzin would remember in later years how he never-minded when his peace and solitude was shattered by Pema's usually funny and boisterous entrances.

Jun, Pema's mentor, was hard at work trying to work those qualities out of her charge while Tenzin was equally working to retain them.

* * *

><p>Within the cold winter of that same year, his father finally passed away.<p>

Towards the end, Aang had called each of his children to his sickbed to give to each his last words just for them.

When he called Tenzin, Aang had been weak in body but still clear and strong in mind.

"My son... I know what I am about to say might seem a little out-of-place to you right now but I need to say it before this world fades from my sight."

"What is it, Father?"

"I want you to be happy."

"Father?"

Aang stared at him intently. "Over the years I have learned many things but one is clearer than most. A sunless garden never blooms and never becomes all that it could be."

Tenzin frowned. "I don't understand."

"Tenzin, relationships require careful tending to remain strong but if there is no sun than all that work will still come to nothing. Your mother and I want you to be happy. Only you can decide what will do that for you. There is no shame in a choice for your own happiness. I am proud of you, Tenzin."

He had left his father's bedside more confused than anything else.

A few hours later, Aang breathed his last with his family at his side.

* * *

><p>As that loss started to settle in over the weeks following, Tenzin could barely vocalize his grief even to his mother and siblings.<p>

Lin tried to give him comfort but he even rebuffed her. Tenzin just operated on autopilot – making his way through the almost countless rounds of visiting mourners and ceremonies to mark his father's passing while he neglected to allow himself to grieve.

A week after the funeral, Tenzin, in a daze, finally made his way back to the garden and to Pema who was busy there with weeding.

"Hello," she said softly once she spotted him.

He nodded his greetings before taking a seat on the bench he had spent a glorious summer week on sanding, repairing and then varnishing.

"The garden is looking lovely."

Pema shrugged and quickly placed a loose lock of hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry about your father. I went to the ceremonies and everything."

"Thank you. It was to be expected."

Pema frowned at him before she squinted up at the sun rolling across the sky.

"It will be spring soon and all of this will bloom again. Life has its cycles too. Just like the Avatar. Ebbs and flows."

Tenzin glanced at her. "What if the sun never came back and it remained winter forever?"

"The plants would never grow then. It would a strange garden with no sun," Pema replied quietly before kneeling back down to the flowerbed she had tended before his arrival.

As he watched her pluck and pull out the straggling roots, Tenzin finally started to cry. Tears rolled down his face and dripped down on to his clothes.

He started a little when Pema, who had spotted him and quickly wiped the damp earth off her hands, carefully put her arm around him.

Tenzin did not fight as she hugged him. Instead he turned into it and wrapped his own arms around her.

When his mother found him an hour later, Tenzin had his face buried into the curve of Pema's neck as he cried.

Katara took over from Pema and enfolded her youngest son in her arms as he sobbed.

She never spotted how Tenzin kept one hand firmly locked around the younger woman's slender one.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

By the time she turned twenty, Pema had fully blossomed into the vibrant woman that they had all seen beneath her earlier shyness and awkward hesitancy.

Tenzin was under no illusions over how privileged he had been to see all of that wonderful personality in full flight far earlier than most as they worked together in the garden.

It was also at this age that Tenzin began to really realize just how very different Pema was compared to Lin.

It was a slow awakening – something he first noticed it during a celebratory dinner. Where Lin was abrasive and to the point even in just general conversation, Pema was gentle but able to put her own opinion across in such a way that allowed even the most fervent of opponents room to see the validity in what she had to say.

Tenzin tried to deny it but he found it harder and harder to have a civil conversation with his girlfriend, especially as her career progressed.

It was becoming blatantly obvious that their paths were diverging. Or at least his had changed anyway.

He didn't want to think about it and always pushed it aside.

Tenzin hated the thought of being the bad guy.

* * *

><p>Jinora, on one fine sunny day, had questioned him on when did he realize that he cared for Pema.<p>

He had immediately distracted her from the answer and sent her off to find her siblings for a vague reason he managed to think up on the fly..

After she had left, Tenzin had sat mediating – or more like brooding - on it for an hour or so.

He came to the conclusion it was Bumi's fault and, since his brother wasn't present to say otherwise, Tenzin considered that the truth.

* * *

><p>Tenzin's carefully constructed walls around the secret affection he harbored for the far younger Pema came crashing down at a gathering held a few short months after Pema's twenty-first birthday.<p>

"You've stared at that poor girl for the past hour. Lin is going to notice soon if you don't knock it off, little brother."

Tenzin scowled and looked away from Pema.

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

Bumi's eyebrows went up so high in mock surprise that Tenzin would not have been shocked if they had flown off his head altogether. "Oh! So you don't notice the pretty little doe-eyed acolyte currently getting chatted up by Councillor Tarrak's son? Fantastic."

Tenzin's scowl deepened. "Pema knows how to handle herself."

Bumi smacked Tenzin across the shoulder, almost knocking his younger brother over in his strength."I'm not worried about her. Pema has a good head on her shoulders. You, however, need to remember your place which last time I checked was with a certain earthbender over there."

His brother left Tenzin rubbing where his hand had impacted while he cheerily joined Kya in another small group.

It was going to bruise Tenzin mused to himself while still rubbing the spot in circles.

The airbender glanced over at Pema.

She was blushing prettily while her amorous suitor fetched her drinks and generally acted the clown to keep her attention.

It didn't lighten his mood to see her respond to the man's attentions.

* * *

><p>At the party's end, the group from the city made their way to the dock and the ship that would ferry them home.<p>

"So you will come to the city tomorrow? Just tea. Promise."

Pema slowly extracted her hand from the younger Tarrak. "I am quite busy with my duties but I will try. I will ring you tomorrow to let you know."

"Great! Great..."

Tenzin watched the whole thing with as casual an air as he could manage - he had already said his own muted farewell to Lin. The couple having fought over the most minor of things all night and to be honest he was relieved it was over and that Lin couldn't stay the night because of work.

Once the ship finally left, he walked back with the rest of the party while Pema trailed behind even the other acolytes as she glanced back now and then at the fast disappearing lights of the ship making its way across the bay.

"You seem to have had a good night."

Pema nearly jumped out of her skin at Tenzin's voice rumbling beside her.

"It was lovely," she said with a slight smile, her interest in the ship now gone.

"So it seemed for you."

They walked slowly together up the hill, neither noticing Tenzin's siblings who had halted at the top and now watched their every move.

"Tarrak has invited me for tea tomorrow."

Tenzin did fake surprise well. "Oh. Are you going?"

"I'm not sure. So many things to do here."

"Indeed."

* * *

><p>They walked along in companionable silence until the halfway point where Pema made to walk the path to the female dorms.<p>

Tenzin waved his brother and sister on. "I will just walk Pema to the dormitory. Just to be safe."

"Heh. Sure. Only to the dormitory," came Kya's muttered reply before she and Bumi followed after their mother.

"I was thinking of working in the garden tomorrow," Tenzin said once they reached the large building housing all the female acolytes.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Finally get stuck in to pruning that old tree. We have meant to get those wayward branches out-of-the-way and tomorrow is only time I have free."

Tenzin saw the pensive look on her face and was inwardly quite smug as Pema fell hook, line and sinker for his words. The garden was something that always caught her.

"I'll help! Oh... it will have to be in the morning since I might make that trip into the city."

"Of course," he replied softly. "I wouldn't want to delay you. The morning will be perfect."


End file.
